Repeat the sounding joy

Sacha's mom and I just got back from the candlelight service at my grandma's church.  It's a church that holds a lot of history for my mom's side of the family, as my great-grandfather was once the pastor there.  As well, the church's incredible organ is named for my great-grandmother, and my grandma has been a member there since she was born, I think. 

It always feels important to me to go to church on Christmas Eve, even though I'm not exactly sure why.  In fact, the whole thing with Christmas gets me into a quandary, because it's a Christian holiday and I'm not a Christian, so why do we celebrate it?  It seems to me that it just has to be about something more than presents and presents and more presents...and it is, with all the family and friends we are lucky to have in our lives.  These days, Christmas is a joyful time for us and (I think) our extended family, because the kids just light the whole thing up. 

Still, I've tackled the religious meaning of Christmas only vaguely with the kids, partly because they're little and partly because I don't know what to say.  I do believe that Jesus was an amazing man who still stands as an example for us all, so maybe I should just stick with that.

Anyway, I love the Christmas Eve service and all the singing and rejoicing over the birth of a baby so long ago.  I love the ritual and joyfulness and togetherness of it. 

I also love my grandma's church, because they are a reconciling Methodist congregation.  That means, essentially, that they got together and decided to explicitly welcome everyone into their congregation, with everyone meaning LGBT people along with everyone else.  From the times I've been there, they not only say the welcoming part, but they really live up to it.  They have people wearing rainbow ribbons on their nametags, gay couples who attend, and yet the vast majority of the congregation is straight and likely on the more conservative end of the spectrum. 

It's really amazing and has practically brought me to tears on occasion, to feel so welcome in a mainstream church.   My grandmother could tell the whole story, but I think it began back in the 1980s, when they had a pastor who eventually turned out to be gay and to have AIDS, which eventually killed him.   This opened the eyes of a lot of church members and eventually led them to where they are today.

When we were there tonight, the choir sang one of my favorite carols, O Holy Night, and one of the verses struck me in particular:

Truly He taught us to love one another;

His law is love and His gospel is peace.

Chains shall He break for the slave is our brother;

And in His name all oppression shall cease.

I may not believe in Jesus the way most people at the church did tonight, but I can get behind that!  And, I think that's the reason I always want to go to church, and this one in particular, on Christmas Eve.  Because the whole story is about love, overflowing love, and that is something to celebrate tonight especially.   Because the story of a baby born in difficult circumstances and yet so celebrated is a story that can resonate with anyone, and which has spoken to me especially since becoming a parent.   And, because, in the darkest days of winter, there is always hope, light, love, gratitude, and/or community to be found somewhere.  That's why I celebrate Christmas, and that's why I went to church tonight.