Castles

We have this one neighbor (well, among many neighbors) who is of the old guard of the neighborhood. She has lived here forever, long before the area started to gentrify, and she's got several generations of her family living in her house. Unlike many such families in the area, her house is the nicest on its block and she clearly does a lot of work to keep it up. She had breast cancer a few years ago, beat it, and is generally a really nice lady.

I don't know what she thought about us at first, as it has recently come to our attention that many of the older residents think we are sisters, but she clearly got what was going on when she found out Sacha was pregnant with Natalia. We told her the news as she passed by our house one day on a walk, and she said something that I don't remember in an extremely disappointed voice and just shook her head in a way that was not positive. Now that I look back on it, it wasn't that big of a deal. It's not like we haven't gotten those looks before. But it was pretty demoralizing at the time, because we had gotten to know her a little bit, which is supposed to help people not be so judgmental when they find out about someone being gay or any other closet-like thing, and yet she still acted that way.

Anyway, I don't know if she changed her mind or if she's just a nice lady in spite of her opinions, but she started randomly dropping off toys at our house that she didn't need anymore. They would just appear on our porch - a baby gate here, another toy there. She kept mentioning these blocks that she was going to give us, probably for a year at least, and then eventually they appeared on our porch, too. At first, Mateo had no interest in them and Tali was too little, but suddenly the blocks have become Very Cool. Mateo calls them Loretta's Blocks for obvious reasons and has started to construct castles and other things out of them. Of course, Tali always wants to get in and break things up, but that's a story for another time.

The point is, the whole thing got me thinking about castles and that saying that your home is your castle. Loretta's home is clearly her castle, and ours is ours, in the sense that it's the place where we feel most safe and comfortable and able to be ourselves. It makes me feel really good that she was able to reach outside of her comfort zone to give us those blocks. In turn, I feel good about us that we were able to accept them without getting caught up in the hurt of her unpleasant comments. This may be the most generic thing I've ever said (this one's for you, Uncle G), but it reminds me that we're all just people trying to live our lives and, in this case, a difference of opinion didn't need to stop a connection from being made. In fact, it went beyond that to give Mateo and Natalia a great set of blocks to play with, and a good association with a friend in the neighborhood who is a person of color, of whom they know too few.

I have to post these photos because of several things. First, Mateo's castle. It hasn't developed beyond the perimeter yet, but I'm sure it will. This is the first time he's ever really wanted to build something, so I'm curious to see what he'll come up with. Then, him and Tali in their new hats that I just bought them at a local store. M's is a cars hat and Tali's is a cupcake hat that she mostly refuses to wear. Still, I think they're cute.

Finally, our son in his favorite pose of late: gnawing at his fingernails. I remember biting my nails as a kid, but not this constant thing like he does. Maybe my mom can chime in and refresh my memory. What I do remember is a bunch of things being tried to get me to stop, and the end result is that I still bite my nails to this day. If I have to have a vice, I consider this one to be very mild. So, in light of that, I have done nothing at all to stop Mateo from biting his nails, but I do often ask him to take his hand out of his mouth for photos or in public places with lots of germs. This is a much more typical pose than most of our photos, though:

I just got back from this book group I'm in with some of the moms from Mateo's preschool and I had so much fun! Now I'm feeling all chatty, so I thought I'd write something. We had a big day, complete with preschool for Mateo, massive errand-running and then new-dresser-assembling for Natalia, and then naptime and a new workout for me. I tried a kettle ball for the first time and I think I'm going to be very sore tomorrow. Then, a trip to the soaking pool with friends, dinner, and some quick playtime at home with Mommy before bedtime. Tomorrow, I'm going to help Sacha out at school and we're going to do the paperwork to donate our old car, and then it will be the weekend! And now I must go to bed. I think I might have had a little too much dark chocolate at the book club, because I am feeling wide awake at a time when I am normally comatose....