Birth order

I was at the library earlier and I picked up a book on impulse called The Birth Order Book.  It's all about what you might expect - the role birth order has upon people.  It also goes into how this can affect both personal and business relationships, and also how it can affect parenting.  The author breaks things down into four groups and between me, my two siblings, and Sacha, we have it all covered:  the firstborn, the middle child, the youngest child, and the only child. 

Of course, I have to admit that I spent most of my time (Sacha and I went out to a tea house for our date tonight and spent time just quietly reading, which was heavenly) reading about my own category (firstborn).  However, we both checked out the section on parenting middle children in particular, because one of our reservations about having a third child was that Tali would instantly become a middle child, and we certainly didn't want her to feel lost in the shuffle. 

One of the book's more interesting points was that parents tend to feel like they understand the child in the same birth position as they have, so that would mean that both Sacha and I, as oldest/only children, would see ourselves most reflected in Mateo.  I'm not sure that's true, but it's good to know about so that we can make sure we're not favoring anyone over anyone else. 

It also reminded us that it is really important to schedule special time with one parent or the other for all the kids periodically.  We've done this with Mateo but haven't been as intentional or successful in making it happen with Talia.  Reading this book makes me feel much more committed to doing that. 

One thing I do feel good about, though, is that we have defied the stereotype of taking successively less pictures and paying less attention to each successive kid.  It's really thanks to this blog that we have so many photos of each kid as a baby and on up.  It's a good motivator to keep the camera out and handy. 

I seem to be rambling here, but the book gave me some food for thought and I thought I'd share.  I'm sure this will always be the case, but we're just learning as we go and can use all the help and insight we can get!